Memories of my loving mother – Feeling her absence

lamp

Couple of days back, I had met one of my relatives. The lady was surprised to see me. She had seen me a year ago. She was saying “You have gone down quite drastically. What is really wrong with you???”. I could hardly speak, when she had asked me. I fumbled as my mind was filled with agony.

It has been about 9 months. I still feel my mother’s  absence. I will feel it throughout my life. I pen down these lines today with tears in my eyes, sitting at my office cubicle.  I still feel the depression. Sometimes, I cannot take food, due to mental agony. I don’t feel the appetite.  Sometimes, I get a shiver when I think of her. Sometimes, I weep a lot.  I had developed a kind of irritation and anger in my life. I feel, its difficult to live without her. Nobody can give me the support and courage in life as much as she did.  She was the happiness in my life.  Yesterday, I had offered a silent prayer to her with a candle near her photo. May her soul rest in peace.

“Mother, You were the source of support and courage in my life. You were my strength. You were everything to me. I miss you a lot. I feel your absence every minute. ” 

 

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Memories of my loving mother- the coffee time

Her memories still haunt me. She was a great mother. The love and care that she showed was beyond words. She always made sure that I had my food on time. When I was at office, she used to call me every afternoon to see that I had my lunch and in the evening for snacks. When I was stuck after the office hours in the evening, she would call me and ask me to come home soon as she was worried about my safety. Every single day, after coming home from office, I would prepare coffee, sit next to her and share all that happened during the day, about my work, my friends, office, etc. She was a good friend of me, jovial, talkative and we shared many happy moments together. She was a person with lot of patience and would rarely lose her temper under any circumstances. She was the most intelligent person at home and was very good at analysing different situations, giving timely advice and solutions to different problems. In a way, we were very much attached to each other. She was supportive in every aspect of my life irrespective of all the pain that she suffered from Rheumatoid arthritis.

I used to cook food for her, keeping her health and liking in mind. She was quite happy with it, and sometimes used to give a blessing

“Annadata sukhee bhava” (Let happiness be on the person who serves food”).

“Mother, I miss you a lot. I miss all the happy moments that I spent with you, especially the coffee time. I miss all the love and care that you showed me.  It’s really sad  that you are not with me today”.

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Memories of my loving mother

It’s really hard and painful. The pain is unimaginable. It’s a pain that would last for a lifetime. It’s a wound that would never heal.  It’s a never-ending sorrow. I could not console myself. Nothing in this world can help to overcome the pain.  I am not able to digest the fact that she is no more. She was quite healthy, normal and jovial. I feel she has disappeared suddenly. It is really shocking. The loss is irreparable. She will never come back . I will never be able to listen to her voice again.  Every minute reminds me of her, and the time that I had spent with her. I feel her absence all the time. I remember her each time I take food, especially coffee. She was very fond of coffee, and we had spent lot of memorable coffee time together. It’s very hard to live without her. Her memories would never fade away.

Motherly love can never be replaced. Words can hardly describe the love that she showed towards me. I was very much attached to her. So much that every single day, I used to share all my happiness and difficulties with her. She listened to all that with lot of patience, irrespective of all her health problems and pain. She stood by me during difficult times in life and gave me lot of strength to fight them. She was “THE MOTIVATING FACTOR” behind all my achievements. She encouraged me to work hard and strive for success in life. Without her motivation, I would not be what I am today.

“Amma, all the achievements that I have on my resume, my education, my M.Tech degree, my job and my success are all because of you. I would like to dedicate it to you”

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Sunset along river Krishna

This is one of the most wonderful pictures taken by me during lifetime. The photograph is taken from Prakasam Barrage at Vijayawada. It was clicked in the evening with sunlight gleaming on waters of the mighty Krishna river. A small boat traveling across adds to the beauty of the pic.

 

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Dreams unlimited

Do you dare to dream beyond what others can ever dream of? Are dreams stepping stones for success? Every person in the world has a dream. To make it big in life, one needs to dream big. Dreams transform into thoughts. Thoughts result in action. One should have a goal or vision in life to be successful.

Shah Rukh khan talks about dream of becoming an actor in one of his movies.
With the film fare award in hand he delivers the following inspiring speech:
“Itni shiddat se tumhe paane ki koshish ki hai to har zarre ne tumse milane ki saazish ki hai. Kehne waale kehte hain ki kisi cheez ko agar dil se chaho to pure kaynaat use tumse milane ki koshish me lag jaati hai.  Aaj mere khwaab yakeen me badal gaya, itna ki I feel like the king of the world. Aur filmon ki tarah hamare zindagi mein bhi sab kuch theek chalta hai, happy ending,  aur agar theek nahin hua tho woh the end nahin hain doston,  picture abhi baki hai.”

I was wondering, what is that moment in life when I felt I have achieved something after a great toil?? On the day of admission at IIIT, I was standing in a long queue at BLN’s office for hostel allotment.  I felt that the chase for my dream of working with electronic devices would start here. I was fascinated by these devices from the time I was a child.
“Its about waves. The Electromagnetic waves, which are transmitted in the air are caught by the antenna and we are able to listen to the songs” replied dad to my curious question.  I was just seven then.  I always wondered how these small electronic devices work. My curiosity about electronics had grown after I joined junior college, when I had taken up to some basic course work on electronic stuff.  I wanted to be an electronics engineer.  I wanted to design electronic devices and systems that can do wonders, systems that can change the world,  the way we live,  devices that have the capabilities which the world had never seen or heard before, devices which can bring revolution in our lives, and come up with inventions and patents.
I felt the chase for my dreams would start at here. How far would I go from here? Will I ever be able to see the day when my dreams would turn into reality??  Well, its wait and watch, but every day of my life, I would strive
to work towards my dreams, to turn my dreams to reality. Oh God!!! Let my dreams come true!!! Amen!!  

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The rare testimonial

It was during those IIIT days that I got addicted to orkut. Scrapping became a routine.  My friends  knew that I would hang out in the world of orkut, and would scrap to call me for lunch, dinner, tea or snacks.  There was often a rivalry about the number of scraps or even fans. “Neekente, neeku chaala mandi fans unnaru”
Madhuri used to tell me. (You have too many fans !!! :)). The best part of orkutting I ever remember was this lovely  testimonial from Madhuri. It was one of the best testimonials that I ever received from a person.  It was not public as she had deleted the testimonial, but somehow, I could retrieve it from my orkut account. The testimonial is of course in German, as she is a German freak. Read it if you understand it!!! (Yahoo babel fish can help you).

Sie ist ein schönes und intelligente Mädchen, ein sehr professionell und punctual.Obwohl, sie sie ein studious studentin ,aber hat eine andere Seite in ihr, das Spaßlieben, aktiv und sie ist ein guter Maler, ich mag sie sehr, ich kam, zu wissen, daß sie mag tanzen ..du mir dieses nie?? erklärte? :-).ok das ganzes beste während Ihrer Zukunft.:-)

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Happy new year 2012

I wish all the readers a very happy new year 2012. To kick off the new year, I would like to start my blogging by an inspiring Facebook post by Renuka:

A Beautiful year is waiting for you,
Walk with aims, run with Confidence,
Fly With your Achievements, May u have a lovely year..
HAPPY NEW YEAR to all my dear Friends..

The new year started with a lot of new resolutions, most of which are highly confidential 😛 . There is one resolution, which I felt, is worth posting. Every day of the year, I would like to walk into the office with the same energy, excitement and enthusiasm as Arjun Rampal in the song Subah subah. That would make every single day at work exciting. The song starts with the strumming of the acoustic guitar which gives enough energy to the song. The song has been a source of inspiration for me throughout the year 2011.

At the office front our team partied out at Domino’s. It was a lot fun and a great way to start the year. Hope all my team members have a great year ahead.

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The Nonsense Project

Disclaimer: All the content given in this post are completely fictitious with the intention to  incorporate some humor into the post. Any resemblance with a website or a software package is purely coincidental.

1. Origin
This project was started in Silicon Valley by Anonymous Software pvt ltd. to make the life of the developer and the user easy. Later as many as 100000 different companies all over the world contributed to the project.

2.Prerequisites:

  • Use at least a 20 core Intel 100000 giga hertz processor.
  • Have a 1000GB RAM. If you have less than 500GB RAM on your system, you will find the builds prohibitively slow.
  • 1000 Tera Byte hard disk. At the time of build, the project generates binaries which are more than 100 Tera byte.
  • Windows Super XP 6790909 or later.

3. Getting Started
Read the 10000 page instruction pdf manual before starting the build.  Read it again! Follow the steps carefully. Download and install the softwares in the same order as given in the documentation.

4. Getting the code:

Get the fresh clone of the project from the command
git clone https://github.com/GetNonsenseCode/GetNonsenseCode.git
The above download may take about 78 hours even in a system with the above specifications. Wait for the download to complete fully.

5. Building the code
After download you can fire the build by running the following script.
NonsenseCode/Script/buildNonsenseProjct
This may take a few weeks to few months. More likely, 2 weeks. If you get any build errors, kindly refer to the FAQ or rather FBE (Frequently encountered Build Errors)
in our website and fix them accordingly. If it still doesn’t work, repeating this process probably won’t help. After a few weeks, if you get the build through then, follow the instructions given below to run the project.
6. Running Nonsense Project:
The Nonsense.exe executable can be found at NonsenseCode/Debug/Nonsense.exe or Nonsense/Release/Nonsense.exe, depending on the selected build configuration.
Because of Nonsense’s unique architecture, there are a number of special challenges associated with development. See Debugging Nonsense for more information. Once you’re comfortable with building Nonsense, read the Contributing Code page for information about writing code for Nonsense and contributing it. You can also run the code by running the following script in cygwin:

NonsenseCode/Script/RunNonsenseProject

You are lucky if the project runs without your sytem being exploded.
Beware of the following errors on the system:
1. Before the system crashes at the time of compilation, look out for the following error:
Fatal: Build unsuccessful due to error in linking .junk and .crap. The system will crash in a few moments.
Shut down your system to save it!!!
2. Also with the following error:
Highly Fatal: Build unsuccessful. The system will explode in a few moments. Stay at least 10 feet away  from the system.

6. Accelerating the project build:

  • Disable your anti-virus software for .ilk, .pdb, .cc, .h .junk, .crap and .bogus files and only check for viruses on modify. Disable scanning the directory where your sources reside.
  • Reduce number of parallel builds. The Nonsense project requires a lot of memory to link if you build to many sub-projects simultaneously your PC will slow to crawl during the linking phase because of the linkers fighting for the swap. If the process continues, there is a danger of they system crashing or even exploding (see section 5 above).
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Mobile Web Application Development

Can we write an application that runs across various mobile phone platforms like Android, Iphone, Blackberry, WebOS etc? A web-based framework makes this a reality.

A multiple phone web-based application framework is a software framework that is designed to support the development of phone applications that are written as embedded dynamic websites(using HTML,css and Javascript) and may leverage native phone capabilities, like Geo data or contact lists.

A native app is one that is specifically designed to run on a device’s operating system and machine firmware, and typically needs to be adapted for different devices. Native apps have a much better experience than web apps, especially on slower devices (like the iPhone). The reason that native apps greatly out perform web apps is that there is a lot more processing power used to render website than it is to render native apps because websites need to run through back-end engine, such as WebKit. These applications are highly specific to a particular mobile operating system and are not portable on other platforms. On the other hand, a web-based applications are typically written with HTML, css and Javascript. They can be deployed on any of the platforms, since all these platforms usually have WebKit as the back-end rendering engine. This reduces a lot of time and effort of the developers as it is much easier to write the web apps than the native apps. It also gives an edge to various organizations as a single app developed can be deployed on various platforms, increasing the scope for the business. They support various features like camera access, Geo Location(or GPS access), Accelerometer access, Audio/Video capabilities and contact access. They also provide Touch/gestural interfaces and support Swipe, tap, scrolling lists etc. The HTML5 apps are also capable of dynamically adapting to the view-port size in both portrait and landscape modes on mobile phones as well as on tablets.

Bluetooth access is one feature that HTML5 has not addressed yet. HTML5 graphics performance for fast-moving games that have a lot of animation can’t match native’s performance, and probably won’t for some time to come. But for pretty much anything else, HTML5 is good enough.

With mobile device manufactures each having its own preferred development environment, a growth mobile phone application developments that are World Wide Web capable and a large population of HTML savvy developers, there has arisen web-based application frameworks to help developers write applications that can be deployed on multiple devices. A number of such frameworks are available in the market such as JQTouch,SenchaTouch(from Sencha), and Qooxdoo. All the three frameworks have support for IOS and Android. Senchatouch has support for Blackberry. Qooxdoo has best look and feel out of all the three and can also be used for Desktop environment. But Qooxdoo has a huge code base and writing applications on the framework is much more complicated. JQTouch has much lesser code complexity when compared to SenchaTouch and Qooxdoo. It has support for various UI features like form elements and lists, animations like swipe, scroll etc. All these features make JQTouch more feasible to be deployed on iOS and android.

Accessing Native Services- the Phonegap:

Phone-gap is an open source solution for building cross-platform mobile apps with HTML5, CSS and JavaScript. Phone-gap also provides a framework to access the native services of mobile phones such as Accelerometer, Camera, Compass, Contacts, File, Geo Location(the GPS access), Media, Network, storage and notifications like Alert, beep and vibrate. Most of the features are supported across Android, IOS, WebOS, Symbian and Bada. The features of Camera, Geo Location, notification and call have been tested and found working on olive pad (android device) ,Geo location and call features work on iPhone 4. The other features need further investigation on different devices.

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Exam time !!! Exam time!!!

It was around 8 30 in the evening and after the dinner at the mess, I was hurrying to my hostel room at the third floor. The very thought of ITWS exam next day sent a wave of panic.  I din’t have a slightest clue about the syllabus. All that I knew was, I had to prepare Shell scripting, perl scripting, php, mysql and HTML for the exam. That was too much in short time. I had not started my preparation either. Probably it was a 2 credit course and I had taken it easily, or maybe I had spent all my time downloading movies through DC++ and watching them.  I was going up the stairs in the first floor, when I met Renuka, walking around seriously in the corridor with a book in her hand.
Me: How was your Operating system exam today??
Renuka: It was pretty bad.
Me: But I think you had prepared quite well for the exam??
Renuka: My exam preparation was good.I had done quite badly in the exam. In fact, I had to give almost a blank paper.
Me: Oh… 😮 (looks surprised).
Renuka: Yeah, Dr. Kamal’s exams are quite tough. He conducts open book exams. The questions are so tough, that we can hardly answer a single question, even after good preparation. Since it’s a negative marking exam, very few of them get positive scores. Since the grading is relative, I preferred giving a blank paper, instead of writing some crap and getting negative marks.
Me: Thats really bad.What is the next exam??
Renuka: Advanced Algorithms.
Me: All the best..

It was almost nine at night and I started quickly browsing through the slides of lectures. The slides seemed never ending. Too many regular expressions, too many commands and too many programs. I was feeling sleepy already. What should I do now?? I never liked to burn the midnight oil for the exam. I decided to take the help of Rajani, who had finished the ITWS course in the earlier sem.  I went to Rajani’s room and knocked the door.
Me: Hey Rajani, sorry to disturb you, are you preparing for your exam??
Rajani: Yeah, we have FEM(Finite Element Methods) tomorrow. Its pretty tough.
Me: Can you do me a favour?? I have not yet started my preparation for ITWS. Can you tell me what to prepare for the exam??
Rajani: I will tell you some important questions, you can prepare them. Mostly, I guess the same questions will be asked. You can try your luck with these.

I had enough time to prepare the questions that Rajani had given me. Next day, I was surprised to see the  same questions on the exam paper. I was just lucky….

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